Yes, you read the title correctly. I haven't quite decided if it is entirely accurate yet or not. I have had a wonderful weekend surrounded by sunshiney lakefronts, roasting smorish fires and great company. It was very relaxing. There were boats to be paddled and chug around the lake in. Children were covered in sand and the bears were on hiatus. It was gloriously gorgeous. To the point that I didn't really fancy coming back to unpacking of the van, nor the putting away of the camping gear, nor of the last minute "holy crap I have to have peanut free snacks for school lunches" grocery shop, or the "what do you mean McDonalds is cash only tonight" line up...
I am having a slight problem with the end of summer as you might gather. I love it. I am also noticing that I really dislike changes in routine. With back to school, you have to adjust to the new schedule of afterschool activities. We have added some and subtracted some. These mean yet more changes to routines. People move away and people come back and this means more changes. I am finding that some of these adjustments are difficult.
Motivation is a critical thing in developing relationships. There is the motivation of thoroughly enjoying people's company. That is ideal. There is that of family, work, school and acquaintences and some of these do not necessarily qualify in the above statement, although it is nice when it happens like that. Right now, I am trying to find the value in changing relationships. I liked my routine last year and this year, it will be completely different. Already, I am noticing the shift and I don't like it altogether.
Having said that, with the summer came new friendships and new relationships that I have also thoroughly enjoyed. Not all change is bad. I have an old friend moving back which is also fun and adds more to the mixture. I have learned to share my stories and experiences with outsiders and have had them appreciated. I have also learned not to talk when it will only cause disruption. (Except for the neighbors whose language needed a bit of adjustment.)
However, with the autumn comes change. New teachers, new bus stop, new schedule and new chaos. I just hope that I can keep up with it. I hope that I can make time to make it work. I hope I can be motivated by the positive changes and ignore the negative. But in that hope I wonder: Does everyone feel this? Do you feel like insanity is just about to be unleashed? Are you dreading that meet the teacher? Dreading the wake up routine? Bus stop shuffle? The DARK?
Anyway - working towards being more positive =
I will make time for those that matter
I will make time for those who need
I will make time for those that love
I will make time for those that heal
I will make time for those that spread happy
I will make time for me and
I will make time for you
But I won't make time for the "negative blue" ...that box is being shelved until the next time it falls off, and then it can be shelved all over again. Yep...the seasonal change panic button...perhaps that should go in the box too.
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