Sunday, March 15, 2015
Hooliganting: Costa Rica: Welcome to the City
Hooliganting: Costa Rica: Welcome to the City: Arriving into Costa Rica, the tired burns your eyes and the shining halls soothe. Security was easy and the final check point was also eas...
Costa Rica: Welcome to the City
Arriving into Costa Rica, the tired burns your eyes and the shining halls soothe. Security was easy and the final check point was also easy. Something that they don't tell you is that you should get your SIM card sorted out before you leave. GPS here is a priory as nothing has an address and nothing has directions. Driving around in the dark after getting the rental car was stressful and quite frankly, infuriating.
We
are. Blessed this week to be staying at the Taranova Villas Palmas, a
three bedroom condominium with great security and a walkable
neighborhood. Church bells are chiming in the distance and traffic is
muted, except for the loud motorbikes.
Today
was day one. We got groceries, and then headed with Sol Tropicana Tours
into San Jose for a city tour. We toured the cultural embassies and saw
the old airport which is now a school. Reclaimed land and sustainable
development were big themes on the tour. Did you know that owning guns
is illegal in your home? Did you know that they have 100% clean energy?
Did you know that they have passed a law that makes zoos illegal? I do
now.
We had a lot of fun at a
local gallery that made indigenous art. They had the gold, silver and
bronze jewelry. They had a very informative lecture and we decided to
take advantage of the local coffee. Sipped coffee and bought some
awesome pieces made of silver and recycled wire. Beautiful.
From
there it was to downtown. We had time at the cathedral and then went to
the National Theatre. We saw the scramble of the street vendors trying
to avoid the police and wonderful views of the downtown bustle. The
cathedral was opulent and quiet, while the theatre was covered with gold
leaf art and marble, a mixture of Italian and French architecture. It
was stunning and the acoustics were perfect. The best part was learning
the secrets of the moving floor, and the painting with the mistakes.
Even better were the paintings with optical illusions...I won't wreck
your tour.
Sadly, we also learned the lesson of "do not drive in Rush Hour". My darling child left her retainer on the plane and we can't find it. So, we had to head back there to file paperwork. 12 kilometers took 45 minutes. It was worse on the way back. We. Also learned to check the numbers on the liscence plate, something the rental car company failed to mention. Ending in one or two, don't drive Monday. Our ends in 8, so no driving Thursday.
By the time we hit Grandmas House for dinner we were starving. The food...just order what Laurie tells you to. The menu is simple and perfect for adults and children. Cooked freshly in front of your eyes, with veggies and wicked tastes, you really have stepped into grandma kitchen.
From the tour , we had cruised
around and spied some options for tomorrow. A good restaurant and great
museums. I think we have a winner. The country feels beautiful and safe.
So far so good. Thirteen days to go.
 | ||||||||
| Italian Embassy |
 |
| Guide giving a very informative and detailed description of the cultural heritage. Sol Tropical Tours stop one. |
 |
| Outside the Metropolitan Cathedral |
 |
| Christian of Sol Tropical Tours |
 |
| National Theatre...Marble and Gold aplenty |
 |
| Mahogany Chairs |
 |
| Paintings that watch you |
 |
| Traffic is a headache. Can take 45 minutes to drive 4 km at rush hour (which this wasn't). |
Friday, February 6, 2015
Hooliganting: Failure: Warts and all
Hooliganting: Failure: Warts and all: Failure. It's a negative word with a whole lot of negative emotion behind it. Mistakes. Good intentions gone wrong. Misunderstood. Didn&...
Failure: Warts and all
Failure. It's a negative word with a whole lot of negative emotion behind it. Mistakes. Good intentions gone wrong. Misunderstood. Didn't try. Not good enough. Not focused. How many times have you heard it? How many times have you experienced it? Are you honest enough to own your own "failures?" Epic fail...it's a term that has come out of my mouth. So, maybe, just maybe, it is time to seriously THINK about it.
I have often said that I do stupid things with good intentions. That unwitting judgment call that I think will turn out positively and comes back with a truck load of hurt feelings and others jumping to conclusions that I never meant. I have experienced it several times and I wind up with my own hurt feelings back. I own those and learn from them. I learn who takes things differently than I do and I learn to apologize and move forward with new growth and understanding. At 42, that isn't any easier than it was at 12. It just happens less often. I have also learned to appreciate the friends in my life that love me "warts and all" who will accept me for who and what I am.
As parent though, this develops differently. I want the best for my kids. Doesn't everyone? I have signed them up for all sorts of activities over the years trying to find things that work for their personalities and fit the schedule and the budget. I get told that my kids are over programmed but I have some solid reasons for that. First, we live north. I can't just tell them to go outside to play in minus a million degrees. They swim and dance so we work the mind, memory and body. My youngest does music and voice as she has shown a strong aptitude for it. My eldest does art for the same reason. The toughest part is that not everyone is good at everything. It seems that the things I really think they would shine at are not even offered here. No track team. No dive team. No syncrhonized swimming.
Add to that, my eldest child continuously takes criticism for a "lack of focus." Her fault (read genetic make-up and escapism here). At 12, she already has issues believing that she is not good enough and that no matter how hard she tries, there will be fault assigned to her. She has been requested not to participate in several activities (soccer, highland dance, less dance, no more music) and recommended to take more art. Have you ever tried to get an art teacher? We have been so blessed by ours but she needs more and it just isn't offered consistently. She tries so hard to please and always seems to fall short of other peoples expectations. Further to that, sometimes she just isn't given the chance because people assume that she will fail without even giving her the chance to try. How damaging is this? And as a parent, how do I support this?
I keep trying to find new avenues for a start. I maintain honest communication with her and let her know where she is succeeding and where people need more from her. I teach her how to manage her "failures" and that is OK to cry. After a wonderful music meeting last night, I gave her the opportunity to choose to try again. *note that I have NO idea what she will decide, but I was delighted to find a music teacher that understood her straight off the bat and made the room safe for her. I show her that I am willing to invest in her, whether her teachers believe in her or not. I tell her to prove them wrong, do her best. I will continue to try and find new avenues for her to be active and creative. I understand that not all learning happens in the classroom. She has a heart of gold and a soul to match. One day, one day soon, I hope that she will realize how much she has to give to her world.
"Failure" comes in other forms too. I see it in my youngest who gets so frustrated and angry when difficult learning opportunities are not perfect the first try. She worries about the imperfections and worries further about people. She struggles to work though it and have faith in her abilities. Comparing herself to others, she feels that she is not "good enough." At 9, how is the pressure acceptable? I ask for her best efforts. We work on tool boxes of reasoning and tool boxes for friendships. She sees herself as the peacemaker and hates conflict so teaching her to understand her relationships is key. Do I get that right all the time. Ummmm...no. Do I understand her all the time? No.
The thing with failure...is that sometimes we have to hit rock bottom in order to learn. It isn't fun, and definately isn't my favorite place to be but somehow, through the bad times, I learn more. I have experiences to share with others. I have new direction and places to go in my world. The best thing that I can do is to learn to change what the word "failure" represents in my world. I need to turn it into an opportunity to do better and to be the best self I can be moving forward. I need to change how that translates to my children so that they can know that being last is OK. That being less than perfect is OK. That their best efforts are indeed, enough. Not everyone can be a star, but everyone, absolutely everyone, better know how to be a good cheerleader and be a good support for those that are stars.
The world without people in it would be meaningless. What good are the mountains and the rivers without animals and people to enjoy them? Life is for living, full and flat out. If you fall, get up? If there is a fire, there will be regrowth. It is how it works and isn't it beautiful? We cry when happy and when sad. Poignency. Let's make failure translate to success. Let's be poignant.
I share this with my children and teach them to be stronger within themselves. They might not be the bright shining stars of their world right now, but I bet you anything they will make adults worth knowing. Just please, give each other a chance and experience the wonderful people that we all are. "Warts and all."
As parent though, this develops differently. I want the best for my kids. Doesn't everyone? I have signed them up for all sorts of activities over the years trying to find things that work for their personalities and fit the schedule and the budget. I get told that my kids are over programmed but I have some solid reasons for that. First, we live north. I can't just tell them to go outside to play in minus a million degrees. They swim and dance so we work the mind, memory and body. My youngest does music and voice as she has shown a strong aptitude for it. My eldest does art for the same reason. The toughest part is that not everyone is good at everything. It seems that the things I really think they would shine at are not even offered here. No track team. No dive team. No syncrhonized swimming.
I keep trying to find new avenues for a start. I maintain honest communication with her and let her know where she is succeeding and where people need more from her. I teach her how to manage her "failures" and that is OK to cry. After a wonderful music meeting last night, I gave her the opportunity to choose to try again. *note that I have NO idea what she will decide, but I was delighted to find a music teacher that understood her straight off the bat and made the room safe for her. I show her that I am willing to invest in her, whether her teachers believe in her or not. I tell her to prove them wrong, do her best. I will continue to try and find new avenues for her to be active and creative. I understand that not all learning happens in the classroom. She has a heart of gold and a soul to match. One day, one day soon, I hope that she will realize how much she has to give to her world.
The thing with failure...is that sometimes we have to hit rock bottom in order to learn. It isn't fun, and definately isn't my favorite place to be but somehow, through the bad times, I learn more. I have experiences to share with others. I have new direction and places to go in my world. The best thing that I can do is to learn to change what the word "failure" represents in my world. I need to turn it into an opportunity to do better and to be the best self I can be moving forward. I need to change how that translates to my children so that they can know that being last is OK. That being less than perfect is OK. That their best efforts are indeed, enough. Not everyone can be a star, but everyone, absolutely everyone, better know how to be a good cheerleader and be a good support for those that are stars.
I share this with my children and teach them to be stronger within themselves. They might not be the bright shining stars of their world right now, but I bet you anything they will make adults worth knowing. Just please, give each other a chance and experience the wonderful people that we all are. "Warts and all."
Thursday, January 1, 2015
Reflections
This blogger has been silent for awhile. Everytime, I thought I had something to say, I found that silence was better. I still wrote the pieces but due to offending other people in my current sphere of personal influences, the send button was not an option. 2014 was a year full of highs and lows. I have been very happy and very defeated.
Why?
2014 was the year of family and family connections. These are the highights from weddings to renewing relationships, I have appreciated the opportunities and blessings that have come from family. Traveling was amazing and the laughter and new experiences beyond measure. Better yet, I was blessed to discover how invaluable my framily are. I learned to lean on others and to appreciate the blessings that my sphere of people are. Especially in the latter part of the year, I realized how amazing my northern family is. I love you very much peeps!
As a mother, I have had some moments of being exceptionally proud of my kids and moments where I wonder how on earth that child has anything to do with me. It has been a year of changes and new directions for both girls, learning the hard way how their individuality is a blessing. There are always going to be those people better than you at sports, arts, school and life, and being themselves is OK. They are full of sass and spirit and are finding their way through the transitions of girlhood. (Can you say hormones? - better that you don't...) I have posted about swimming, art, music and dance. My hope is that the girls find their passion and live it despite the obstacles in their way.
As 2014 draws to a close, I can say that the winds of change are blowing. I am determined to make 2015 different. Last year, I was hoping for a better year. That was a mistake. The low points of this year are still being dealt with and I can honestly say, I hope that some of the experiences never come calling again. Worst point for me was having to do without a vehicle for a bit. That cost me an opportunity that I still regret not being able to take. It was a lesson in how a split second decision can completely change your life. Therefore, I am now doing what I can to change my future positively and with determination. I am doing what I can to make sure I never get caught out like that again.
So, back to relationships. There has been forgiveness and growth. I have let old hurts go and have moved forward with confidence. I deal with the family dynamics that I have and move past them. How many of you have that person or persons in your life that can send you to the basement faster than any other? I have found myself surrounded by those people this year in certain environments. I have chosen to move past them and around them and in some cases, live with them. I have mentally prepared plans that will create more happiness once the changes are implemented and I am hopeful that it will be quick. Furthermore, I am not going to take on everyone else's critic as my own. That is key.
I have embraced my workouts and eye the battle of the bugle with skepticism. Am I healthy? Yes. Am I slim? Definately not. Can I do anything about it? I have no idea. I have cut out breads and wheat to no avail. I have given up chocolate and cream in the coffee. I eat soup for lunch. I follow the guidelines of my fitnesspal. I gained 20 pounds under a nutritionist and more under weightwatchers. Still, the weight goes up. I think this year, I am going to choose foods that make me happy. Will they be sensible? Likely. But I am going to keep beating myself up because I don't look like the slim beautiful 42 year old that lurks inside my head? Probably once in awhile. I have to be honest, bad habits are hard to break.
I think that the best messages that I can move forward with are the mental messages that will lead me forward with positive feelings and thoughts. I am going to learn how to brush the negative to one side. I am going to be different.
Cheers 2015. Today is a brand new year with no mistakes in it yet.
Why?
2014 was the year of family and family connections. These are the highights from weddings to renewing relationships, I have appreciated the opportunities and blessings that have come from family. Traveling was amazing and the laughter and new experiences beyond measure. Better yet, I was blessed to discover how invaluable my framily are. I learned to lean on others and to appreciate the blessings that my sphere of people are. Especially in the latter part of the year, I realized how amazing my northern family is. I love you very much peeps!
As a mother, I have had some moments of being exceptionally proud of my kids and moments where I wonder how on earth that child has anything to do with me. It has been a year of changes and new directions for both girls, learning the hard way how their individuality is a blessing. There are always going to be those people better than you at sports, arts, school and life, and being themselves is OK. They are full of sass and spirit and are finding their way through the transitions of girlhood. (Can you say hormones? - better that you don't...) I have posted about swimming, art, music and dance. My hope is that the girls find their passion and live it despite the obstacles in their way.
As 2014 draws to a close, I can say that the winds of change are blowing. I am determined to make 2015 different. Last year, I was hoping for a better year. That was a mistake. The low points of this year are still being dealt with and I can honestly say, I hope that some of the experiences never come calling again. Worst point for me was having to do without a vehicle for a bit. That cost me an opportunity that I still regret not being able to take. It was a lesson in how a split second decision can completely change your life. Therefore, I am now doing what I can to change my future positively and with determination. I am doing what I can to make sure I never get caught out like that again.
So, back to relationships. There has been forgiveness and growth. I have let old hurts go and have moved forward with confidence. I deal with the family dynamics that I have and move past them. How many of you have that person or persons in your life that can send you to the basement faster than any other? I have found myself surrounded by those people this year in certain environments. I have chosen to move past them and around them and in some cases, live with them. I have mentally prepared plans that will create more happiness once the changes are implemented and I am hopeful that it will be quick. Furthermore, I am not going to take on everyone else's critic as my own. That is key.
I have embraced my workouts and eye the battle of the bugle with skepticism. Am I healthy? Yes. Am I slim? Definately not. Can I do anything about it? I have no idea. I have cut out breads and wheat to no avail. I have given up chocolate and cream in the coffee. I eat soup for lunch. I follow the guidelines of my fitnesspal. I gained 20 pounds under a nutritionist and more under weightwatchers. Still, the weight goes up. I think this year, I am going to choose foods that make me happy. Will they be sensible? Likely. But I am going to keep beating myself up because I don't look like the slim beautiful 42 year old that lurks inside my head? Probably once in awhile. I have to be honest, bad habits are hard to break.
I think that the best messages that I can move forward with are the mental messages that will lead me forward with positive feelings and thoughts. I am going to learn how to brush the negative to one side. I am going to be different.
Cheers 2015. Today is a brand new year with no mistakes in it yet.
Sunday, September 7, 2014
Hooliganting: When Life Kicks You In the Teeth: Perspective
Hooliganting: When Life Kicks You In the Teeth: Perspective: Interestingly, it has been awhile since I have felt like life is miserable. We all have these moments in our life where things just seem to ...
When Life Kicks You In the Teeth: Perspective
Interestingly, it has been awhile since I have felt like life is miserable. We all have these moments in our life where things just seem to go catastrophically wrong. Sometimes, these moments come from bad moments and decisions that we make. Other times, they are influenced by outside forces. Usually for me, these moments come when a series of disasters link together to knock me on my behind and cause me to question everything in my world. The past four weeks have provided me with a lot of material to think about and question. I have hit stress levels that I haven't had in over 5 years. All this to say, that in the past four weeks, I have grown.
Being used to being the person that does all the things, all the driving and basically being completely self sufficient, circumstances have forced me to ask for help. I hate asking for help. I am bad at it. On the other hand, if you need something done, I will be the first to say OK, with bells on. Do you know what amazes me? Almost everyone I have asked has agreed to help me. I have discovered that my framily around me has my back and will do what it takes to make sure that me and my family are well taken care of. The offers have come with warmth and caring that are fantastic. I am so humbled and grateful for this experience, that it takes some of the sting away.
I have learned that this community has an amazing support network for parents when you need help with parenting. This year, I have had a willing ear from schools and support networks to ensure that my girls have their needs met. When complications in their program arose, the people around my girls adjusted. Amazing. I didn't expect such a quick response and I never expected that I would get what we needed without a fight. Again, I am grateful.
When things in my family went sideways and had to be dealt with, the support was there to make things happen. From health issues to timing issues to a birthday party to back to school, this has not been the easiest past four weeks. And there is more that I am not mentioning because I am still processing it. Faith comes to the forefront in these times and I am grateful that I can rely on meditations and devotions that calm and sooth my soul. I have warm hugs and tea times. I have people that provide humor, and those that provide sympathy and those that have practical solutions. I am grateful.
I guess the lessons to be taken from this experience is that I am not invincible. Better yet, I don't have to be. Isn't that the best gift anyone could have? And maybe, just maybe, it will be a lesson that will stick.
Being used to being the person that does all the things, all the driving and basically being completely self sufficient, circumstances have forced me to ask for help. I hate asking for help. I am bad at it. On the other hand, if you need something done, I will be the first to say OK, with bells on. Do you know what amazes me? Almost everyone I have asked has agreed to help me. I have discovered that my framily around me has my back and will do what it takes to make sure that me and my family are well taken care of. The offers have come with warmth and caring that are fantastic. I am so humbled and grateful for this experience, that it takes some of the sting away.
I have learned that this community has an amazing support network for parents when you need help with parenting. This year, I have had a willing ear from schools and support networks to ensure that my girls have their needs met. When complications in their program arose, the people around my girls adjusted. Amazing. I didn't expect such a quick response and I never expected that I would get what we needed without a fight. Again, I am grateful.
When things in my family went sideways and had to be dealt with, the support was there to make things happen. From health issues to timing issues to a birthday party to back to school, this has not been the easiest past four weeks. And there is more that I am not mentioning because I am still processing it. Faith comes to the forefront in these times and I am grateful that I can rely on meditations and devotions that calm and sooth my soul. I have warm hugs and tea times. I have people that provide humor, and those that provide sympathy and those that have practical solutions. I am grateful.
I guess the lessons to be taken from this experience is that I am not invincible. Better yet, I don't have to be. Isn't that the best gift anyone could have? And maybe, just maybe, it will be a lesson that will stick.
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