Taking All the Time in the World

Living life in the moment is not as easy as it sounds. Remarkably, I have been living life full throttle and intend to continue to do so but now and then, I slow down to think, to ponder and take all the time in the world. It might not look like it, in fact I am sure that it doesn't, but I do.

Tomorrow, the great adventures of Florida begin for me and my extended family and friends. I have been plotting and scheming activities and suitcases. I have slowly packed and repacked until I minimized the luggage and maximized the timeline to still allow for relaxing time. The house is going to be well tended and is clean, and for the moment, all those pesky details like laundry and dishes are done. I usually pack the night before but this time, I have taken two weeks to sort and think.

I have taken time by making appointments with myself to go to the gym and dance, despite the workload and knowing that I need to put more time in at the office. The girls and I had a whole weekend at a hip hop dance convention last weekend that stretched the muscles, mind and imagination. By the end of the weekend, we had learned about house, hip hop, breaking, popping, video choreo versus stage shows and freestyle battles. Wow. Surrounded by talent, I loved the teaching and gentle instruction that was offered. This was time that I borrowed for myself to learn and dance. There is something about the sheer joy of movement and musicality that I appreciate and love. There is a reason that while at Starbucks for coffee, I accidently found myself dancing. Blushing, I said thank you when another lady commented "I like your groove." I hadn't even realized I was dancing in the line. Through dance and the gym, I am focusing on health and mental well being. It is a priority that only happens when I take the time. And it is the easiest time to give away to those that want it.

Sometimes, the to do list can wait. I have taken some time away from writing even, which usually relaxes me and helps me to process my thoughts. However, my usually quirky organized self has had some issues with thinking happy thoughts and quite frankly, I don't usually share the darker shades of blue. Instead, I decided that it was OK to take the time to think and to ponder life. Life is fluid, and full of changes. I have been watching the Canadians participate in the Olympics and have seen some incredible things. I love it when an athlete does their best. The ski being given by the Canadian coach to the Russian skier was amazing. The story of the Swiss skier waiting for the Peruvian skier to finish was tear jerking for me. The sportsmanship and drive is wonderful to watch while the freestyle and snowboarding sports are fun to watch for the tricks and commentary. Only in Canada does our silver medalist apologize. (Read the book How to Be A Canadian by Will Ferguson sometime - there is a whole chapter on how Canadians say sorry). It was a SILVER MEDAL. YAY! I certainly couldn't do it.

Despite the stress of my work week and trying to get ready for a big trip, I still took time with my family to watch my friends' young ladies perform in Les Miserables. The music of the show with the fabulous community acting was tremendous. Sometimes, by being supportive, you are richly blessed and for our town, this was truly a triumph of hard work and dedication. My youngest asked good historical questions and my eldest was fascinated by the sets. In addition, there was an art show and we spent time looking at the lovely prints. My artistic child was so fascinated by one print that it seemed to belong to us, and now it is on our wall. It was titled Corsage from the Secret Garden exhibition.

I think the point is as the winter cold and chills take their toll, and as I have witnessed a wonderful woman navigate her way through grief, and seen others struggle a bit this winter, I have learned the value of thinking things through. For example, before posting lyrics to a fb page, I really listened to my instincts and thought about it for three days before deciding that the message was too good not to share. The words were so resonant with me, that I shared. I have owned my mistakes, and I have made a concious effort to look for the high road. Do or do not, there is no try. Advice has been taken freely and used. I have wise and amazing friends that I really love and appreciate for who they are and as for my girls, sometimes I learn so much from them.

In a wretched debate with my eldest this evening, I found myself losing. She hates her elastics for her braces. They are to be worn when not engaged in eating or sports. The debate raged over breaking the jaw and headgear versus elastics, to which she said she liked her teeth the way they are. Money and health were discussed with vim and the educational qualifications of the orthodontist were showcased to no avail. After all, she doesn't have to wear them for sports. When I stared blankly at her, I was told in no uncertain terms why she didn't have to wear them.

"Life is a Sport."

Ummmm....yeah....I need to think about this some more.

Mom?

You Want Me To Do What Exactly?

Tis January, tis true. It is that time of year where the television blasts out messages of weight loss and new resolutions. It is time to give up all your vises and turn the page of a book, rather than listen to the media. Time to get on the treadmill, instead of lounging in a bubble bath. No smoking, no chocolating, no coffee runs, no rest. January at first glance comes across as the stern disciplinary parent of yore.

January in the north is full of darkness. Mornings are spent dressing and getting to work in the dark. By the time you are home, it is dark again. The children run and play in the dark, if it is even warm enough to go outside. The temperatures have plummeted and the moods have gone with them. So many people seem to be bleak, lacking energy or vibrancy. January comes across as that neighborhood bully that just wants to take your toys, your lunch money and favorite blankie.

Everywhere I turn these days, there is a reason to feel guilt or shame. My clothes are a bit tighter. My lines more curvaceous than straight. I actually like chocolate and bubble baths. While I enjoy exercise, I am actually trying to take things easier so that my muscles heal up a bit. I am down to 6 hours a week and that is low for me. I should work out more. I should limit my carbs. I should sign up for weight watchers. That is the weight of the January blues.

I am watching my weight yes. I am watching to see how depression hits each of my friends in the dark cold months. I am watching to see how the weight of their world shifts and turns. In return, I move mine to be less. I will encourage and be positive. I am determined to have fun in this January. There is dance and tobogganning. Snuggled in front of the fire, I can have a glass of wine and chat on the phone to friends. I can nurse a cup of tea while I catch up with folks on facebook. I can continue to work to make the connections and exercise my options.

For the moment, I think I will go to weight watchers, because three of my friends are doing it and really, it wouldn't hurt. I will continue to exercise both my mind and body, so long as it isn't too much. I will also continue to rest, indulge once in awhile and encourage you to do likewise. While not perfect, I am perfectly me and I am going to color January bright and colorful instead. Until one accepts who they are, they cannot progress to be what they will become. And that, it is . . .for me. Good night!

Slushies

Today is the day that I ponder the winter experience of slushies. Most of the time, the air is crispy and stimulates your lungs. The snow crunches beneath your feet. The tires pack down snow and creates the ruts that rock and roll the vehicles, making them feel more like a safari trek than an actual paved street. This is the typical winter and the majority people are accustomed to it.

However, today was an odd day. Driving the children to school this morning, I noticed that the thermometer was registering a miraculous plus one degree. So, I trekked back and shovelled the drive. Since it was snowing, I did it more than once. The problem was I still had to go out and drive again. I have the pleasure of driving downtown twice most days for dance, gymnastics and so on. Today, was a day for both of those.

The thing that I don't understand, is the way people respond to the "slushie" phenomenon. I start to drive and the snow plows have been active. The roads are very clear, if a little slick to the treads on the van. However, this is not unusual for this time of year. It is winter. In the north, it is always winter in January.

So why is it that when the temperature warms up and the roads get that little bit "slushie" that people forget how to drive. There is a little bit more moisture in the snow. In fact, for the children, this is the perfect snowman snow. There is a little bit of spray that hits the windshield and that means more windshield washer fluid. Might I remind people that the wipers may be switched on prior to departure from a switch located to the right of most steering columns? The roads are as clear as they can be in the winter. Yet, to my irritation and disgust, people are terrified because snow is falling from the sky and it is a different kind of snow.

Thanks to those people that were incapable of driving close to the speed limits, (in fact some were as much as 40 below the posted limit) I was late to the school to pick up my daughter. This behaviour doubled the commute time to all sorts of activities. There were no accidents for a change, but that probably changed later.

The point is, if you are not comfortable driving in the winter conditions. Please don't! Get lessons, figure out a car that works for you, take a bus. My theory is that is equally as dangerous to drive to slow as too fast. The number of cars that pulled out to pass slow vehicles, and the number of trucks sliding to see what their trucks could do in the snow for fun was amazing.

The "slushies" are supposed to be fun. They are almost puddles to jump in. They allow tobogganning, and snowpeople. They are castles from the air and they are a joy. Until you are on the road, and trying to drive somewhere behind people doing a crawl. This is not fun. This is stressful and irritating and frustrating and I am still not over it apparently. So, here is my thought. Do what it takes to be comfortable driving in whatever conditions you live with. Seriously. Drive to the conditions means just that. If you can't, please don't. I will be very grateful. (And yes, I have had winter driving lessons...so that I can drive in the slushies ;)

The Heart of Hooliganting

The snow is crunching under the tires, spitting the remnants of salt and sand at the windshield of the car behind. By car, I am referring to the buggy whipped trucks, slithering cars and any other passenger toting vehicle that happens to be in the trucks rearview. It is very satisfying to drive the streets and watch the Christmas lights shimmer against the cold and the snow. This is hooliganting.

The first stop is the line up at Tim Hortons. Comparably short for this time of night, we are through just in time for shift change. This means that we have time to scrounge through all those change pockets and figure out how many pennies we can get rid of to lighten the load. Two steeped teas and ginger cookies later, the truck is magically transported to the land of memories and stories. This is the northern version of the fairy tale. There is ranting and venting, laughing and snorting, commentary and opinionating and underneath it all, it is that quiet that transends the moment to the experience of driving. Just driving.

The trees are lit. Snowmobiles are careening around the Syne. The teas are sipped. Movie listings are purused and mulled over. Still the truck drives on, humming on the words both spoken and not. Plans are made and rearranged and made again. The truck skims the ice and keeps going. There are deer nosing the ice and more lights dangling from balconies.

That was definately an hour or so well spent. There is that moment of hooliganting at its most elemental and basic. Time spent with a friend doing something that is simple, that matters. How often have you taken the time to just drive? What could you see? What have you missed?