Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Thoughts versus Words

There are times that relationships come into play. In fact, we are born into a sea of relationships in our world that shape us into the person that others come to know. From the first moments, humans have thoughts and feelings. There is trust and mistrust. We learn. Gradually, we surround ourselves with people that matter to us: family and friends, teachers and healers. There are those that we lean on and those that we don't.

From my perspective, I have been blessed to have a tight knit circle of friends and family; including friends that have become family. We might not always get along or see eye to eye, but when needed we are there for each other. One of my closest people posted this today. I thought this described our friendship in a nutshell and I smiled.

I also took some time today to think about those people that I seem to have drifted from. I miss my late night storyteller (who still needs to finish his novel) and some of the college crew. There are friends from childhood and family that live far away. Life intervenes and we lose touch, but I am sure that the memories are strong and that the friendship will remain.

Through going through a program called choices, I learned about personalities and communication. The best part was learning to recognize how I communicate best and what motivates me in my relationships. There has been much healing and grace through this process, and for me a faith centered approach has worked well. "Do unto others..." I do the best I can with the circumstances that I have and try to make wise choices moving forward. I choose to respond to those people that create stronger relationships and care enough to grow with me. I have chosen to not repond to those people that just cause more hurt and disharmony in my world.

Admittedly, you can't always avoid the negative but if someone matters enough, the hurt is worth it. I have children and in trying to raise them to be the wonderful people that God intended, I sometimes get it woefully wrong. I have to be open to advice and sharing of other experiences from other people. I learn. At work, I make mistakes sometimes, but I have to be open to criticism and from that develop new strengths and new methods of relating to people. Is it easy? Not always but it is always worth it. It is not worth it to invest in relationships where I find myself constantly giving and then forgiving. Sometimes, it is having to forgive myself for getting it wrong again. Sometimes, I have to allow myself the time to heal before I reconnect.

The problem is that I think a great deal. I think about people and places. However, I often don't communicate my thoughts into words. While I try to give direct responses to questions, if you don't ask, I won't volunteer information. This means that I can be thinking of you all the time, but will rarely get around to picking up the phone. Yes, I am busy. But, I am never to busy to care. I love to hear your stories and know what is going on in your world. I will creep your facebook to find out that you are OK. So, to the friend that posted the above image...love you lots! And to the rest of you...same goes!


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